At the turn of the 20th century children were considered small adults and they were treated as such. Upper class children had tutors or governess to take care of them and teach them how to enter into society as proper polite and respectable young adults. Etiquette books were printed as guide lines for children to follow, all aspects of a child life was mapped out and controlled.
Books such as Etiquette for Little Folks (part of “Susie Sunbeam’s Series”) was printed in Boston in 1856. It’s a model of didactic mid-19th century children’s literature, and rules children were expected to adhere by.
Etiquette for Little Folk, 1856
Etchings from the Sunshine Series, 1856
Etchings from this book and others like it depict proper behavior, the little girl is taking her brother under her wing and instructing him in proper behavior. She is becoming a leader and stepping into her adult role. They have laid down their toys and are intrigued with this new information regarding manners and etiquette. There mother sits in the background contentedly sewing or knitting watching her perfect offspring excel in societies expectation. This family model etching sets the standard for child and mother relationships.
The text of this etiquette book is bold letter print with not any froufrou text or stories, it is rule after rule, shaping the lives of children of the day. Some rules from this society include directly quoted from the sunshine series :
At Home: If you wish to speak to your parents, and see them engaged in discourse with company, draw back, and leave your business till afterwards; but if it is really necessary to speak to them, be sure to whisper. Never speak to you parents without some title of respect, as Sir, Madam, &c. Never make faces or contortions, nor grimaces, while any one is giving you commands. Use respectful and courteous language towards all the domestics. Never be domineering or insuting, for it is the mark of an ignorant and purse-proud child.
At the Table: Sit not down until your elders are seated. It is unbecoming to take your place first. When you are helped, be not the first to eat.
Among Other Children: Be not selfish altogether, but kind, free, and generous to others. Scorn not, nor laugh at any because of their infirmities; nor affix to any one vexing title of contempt and reproach; but pity such as are so visited, and be glad you are otherwise distinguished and favored.
In School: Bow at entering, especially if the teacher be present. Make not haste out of school, but soberly retire when your turn comes, without hurrying.
In the Street: Jeer not any person whatever. Give your superiors place to pass before you, in any narrow place where two persons cannot pass at once.
Going to a Company: A young person ought to be able to go into a room, and address the company, without the least embarrassment.
Cleanliness: Now, clean garments and a clean person, are as necessary to health, as to prevent giving offence to other people. It is a maxim with me, which I have lived to see verified, that he who is negligent at twenty years of age, will be a sloven at forty, and intolerable at fifty.
Modesty: Nothing can atone for the want of modesty; without it, beauty if ungraceful, and wit detestable.
Good Breading: Observe the best and most well-bred of the French people; how agreeably they insinuate little civilities in their conversation. They think it so essential that they call an honest and civil man by the same name, of “honnete homme;” and the Romans called civility, “humanitas,” as thinking it inseparable from humanity: and depend upon it, that your reputation and success will, in a great measure, depend upon the degree of good breeding of which you are master.
This final warning is a threat to children, if they do not fallow the guide lines of good breeding they will fall into a lower class of society.
Édouard Manet, The Railway (Gare Saint-Lazare) , 1872-73
The etching above of the little girl, is the picture of a proper young lady studying manners. This etching is reflected in Manet painting, The Railway. A young women who has accepted her role in societies turns away from the fence. She is properly dressed in the fashion of the time, perhaps in morning clothing, her puppy sits quietly on her lap as a fashionable accessory of the time. She is proper and prim as she reads her book, perhaps an etiquette book of the time. She sits with her back again the fence to the train station, rejecting or ignoring the new era of the industrial revolution. She has accepted her role in society and is resigned to fulfill it. The smaller girl has her back turned towards the train and the future, she is still properly dressed for her age, but she is looking out past the fence trapping her in. She is not properly posing for the painting but defying society by turning her back, she has not yet been molded to fit into proper society.
Mary Cassatt, Little Girl in Blue Armchair, 1878
Mary Cassatt, Little Girl in Blue Armchair, Is a painting of frustration, board-um, and reality. This little girl has escaped into an area free from rules and expectations, but she still is trapped in the house. Her mother, father, or governess must be away for the moment, so she is taking advantage of this freedom and letting her undergarments show. She is slouching in the chair with nothing to do. She is trapped in the house with nothing to do, as a small proper lady she is not allowed to get messy or rough house so she is trapped by societies expectations and etiquette, yet is is escaping for a few min to be a board small child. She is expected to be a proper lady for her entire life.
For more information about etiquette books visit: http://the-panopticon.blogspot.com/2012/01/lopaprogress.html